Why You Should Video Call Before A First Date

Dating has become more accessible than ever before. With the help of apps like Hinge, Tinder, Bumble, OkCupid, and more, you can connect with women worldwide.

Each app has its own dating strategy and purpose, and the apps have a big time advantage over going out to meet women in person. However, online dating has its own challenges as well. One of the most significant challenges is knowing if the person you're talking to is who they say they are. That's why I think it's essential to video call your matches before your first date.

Why Video Call?

Verify the identity of your match

One of the most obvious benefits of video calling before your first date is the ability to verify her identity. Nowadays, it's not uncommon for people to use fake photos or even fake names to hide their true identities. This can be a major concern for those who want to ensure that the person they're talking to is who they say they are.

There have also been deep fakes used on dating apps, so having a video call beforehand can save you from a very uncomfortable situation. If the person is not willing to video chat with you to make you feel comfortable, they're either not super enthusiastic about exploring a connection with you or just hiding things from you.

Build trust and rapport with your new match, and establish chemistry

Video calls can help you build trust with your match by allowing you to see them in real-time and gauge their reactions to your conversation. You can get a better sense of their personality and determine whether they're someone you'd like to meet in person. There's nothing worse than going on a date with someone and then realizing that you both have nothing in common or you're in different stages in life.

Chemistry is also essential to any successful relationship, and it can be difficult to gauge through messaging alone. For example, if you can make each other laugh and have a natural flow of conversation during the video call, it's a good sign that you'll also have chemistry in person. On the other hand, if the conversation feels forced or awkward, it may be a sign that it's not a good match.

Weed out bad matches

Another benefit of using video calls before your first date is the ability to weed out bad matches. When you're messaging someone online, it's easy to get caught up in the excitement of meeting someone new and overlook red flags. However, when you video call someone, you're able to get a better sense of who they are and whether or not you're compatible.

For example, if you Facetime someone who seems disinterested or distracted, it's a sign that they may not be as invested in meeting up as you are. Similarly, if they make inappropriate comments or seem rude, it's a red flag that they may not be a good match for you. You can also decide to screen the people you go on dates with and make sure that you both are looking for the same thing out of this date. This can let you avoid wasting time on someone who isn't right for you.

Video Call Guide

Several clients asked me how they should approach their video calls before a first date. It should definitely not be a 4-hour long call where you explore all of your deepest passions. You want to check the above, say your goodbyes, and continue your day.

1. Say your greetings. Be normal, and ask about her day and tell her about yours.
2. Set a time constraint. This will prevent you from going on for talking for a long time and show that you have other things going on in your life.
   Example: "Glad I could get you on the phone, I was just about to head to the gym!"
   
3.  Give her a compliment on something she's wearing or how she looks to set a man-to-woman frame in the conversation.
   Example: "You look just as cute as you do in your pictures. We're off to a great start, haha"
4.  Continue conversations that you both have had over text.
5. Ask her out on a date if you haven't already, and set logistics/plans for the date
6. Handle any concerns she may have
7. End the call by saying you're going to do the thing you said you were going to do at the beginning.

When you're on FaceTime with her, you must match her vibe. If she's a bit more bubbly, being upbeat can be helpful.

If she's more chill, then be more chill.

Follow these steps, and you're golden for your first video date.