Are Dating Apps a Waste of Time? The Truth About Finding Love in 2024

Did you know that in 2024, a mind-boggling 323 million people worldwide are swiping, liking, and super-liking their way through dating apps?

That's more than the entire population of the United States!

It's no wonder that everyone, including their grandmother, has an opinion on whether these apps are a godsend or a total waste of time.

Honestly, I've had my fair share of dating app horror stories.

A girl showed up to our coffee date and looked COMPLETELY different than she did in her pictures (and I'm not talking about weight gain or something.)

Another woman spent our entire dinner date talking about her extensive knowledge of 80s hip-hop/rap and how she couldn't stand anybody who didn't listen to that music. Lol.

But I've also witnessed friends find their soulmates on a dating app too.

So, what's the deal?

Are dating apps really worth our time, or are we all just running through a seemingly endless list of profile pics?

Here's the truth, straight from someone who's been in the trenches: dating apps can be frustrating as hell, but they can also be surprisingly effective when used with the right strategy and mindset. In this article, we'll explore the good, the bad, and the downright ugly of online dating.

The Rise Of Dating Apps

My first memory of dating apps was OkCupid, with all of their quizzes and questions. I'll admit I spent way too many hours answering questions like "What was your favorite movie?"

But the real game-changer? Tinder in 2012. Suddenly, finding a date was as easy as ordering a pizza. Left swipe, right swipe – it was like playing a weirdly addictive game where the prize was a date with a stranger. I remember downloading it "just for fun" and sending corny pickup lines to girls with my friends. Ah, good times.

I had no idea people actually used this until much, much later.

Since then, we've seen an explosion of dating apps catering to every niche imaginable. Bumble came along in 2014, putting women in the driver's seat. Then we got Hinge, promising to be the app "designed to be deleted" (though I know plenty of people and clients who've been on it for years).

The numbers are staggering. Tinder alone boasts over 75 million active users monthly—that's like the entire population of France swiping left and right! And it's not just for young folks anymore. The fastest-growing demographic on dating apps is people over 50.

But here's the kicker—despite all these options, people spend more time on dating apps than ever before. The average user spends about 90 minutes a day swiping and chatting—longer than most people spend exercising!

So, are all these apps actually helping us find love, or are they just really good at keeping us glued to our screens?

The Pros of Using Dating Apps

Before I go on a smear campaign for dating apps, let's talk about the reasons why they are okay—the reasons why millions of us keep coming back to them despite the occasional trash date or cringe conversations.

Firstly access. I remember when your dating options were limited to your immediate social circle, that cute girl from your sports league, or that hot girl at your job. Everything's changed, and now you can match with people who live two blocks away from you, but your paths have never crossed. It's crazy.

Next up is convenience. I feel like these days, it's hard to find time to go out and meet new people. Dating apps let you connect with new potential people while you're traveling, waiting for your laundry to dry, or even sitting on the toilet (my favorite)

I've literally set up dates while in my underwear, drinking a protein shake on my bed.

Oh and here's a big one - dating apps can be a great way to practice your dating skills. The way I always looked at it, each conversation and each date is a learning experience. I've become much better at small talk, reading people, and attracting women in a shorter time.

So yeah, dating apps have their upsides. They've revolutionized how we meet new people, making it easier, more convenient, and more fun.

But despite all these benefits, it turns out they're not all they are cracked up to be.

The Cons Of Dating Apps

You know how I was saying it's cool that you can now match with people who live two blocks away and who could be your type? 

What I didn't mention is that now you can see the 50-100 people who are attractive to you, back to back to back. How the hell are you supposed to be able to choose? It's like going to a restaurant with a 50-page menu. You end up spending so much time choosing that by the time you order, you're not even hungry anymore.

Sometimes, I wondered if I was actually looking for a relationship or just killing time.

And, of course, there are the things that everybody hates, like ghosting and potential catfishing. People tend not to live up to the expectations you put of them in your head. It's even worse if you came out of a healthy relationship and now you're expecting that same behavior from most new people you meet.

When these things happen repeatedly, it gets exhausting and leads to burnout.

The constant swiping, the repetitive small talk, the roller coaster of hope and disappointment - it can take a toll on your mental health. There have been times when I've had to delete all my dating apps to give my poor heart a break.

 I recently ran a survey in my Facebook group to see if guys felt the same:

As you can see, over half of the people who took the poll were currently taking a break. So yeah, dating apps aren't everything they're cracked up to be.

They can be frustrating, exhausting, and sometimes downright demoralizing. But before you swear off dating apps forever, hang tight. In the next section we will look at whether people find success on these apps.

Do People Actually Find Love on Dating Apps?

After all the swiping, matching, and awkward first-date small talk, do people actually find love on these apps?

Well, I've got some good news for all you hopeless romantics out there. According to a 2019 study by the Pew Research Center, 12% of American adults have married or been in a committed relationship with someone they met on a dating app. That might not sound like a lot, but consider this: millions of people have found their significant other from an app.

But success isn't just about statistics; it's also about individual experiences, and I have plenty of those to share.

My client Alex met his now-wife on Hinge after many coaching calls with me. They shared their love for alternative pop, Spanish culture, and dance.

Then there's my client Bryce, who found the love of his life on Bumble after taking one of my coaching programs. They bonded so quickly that he went on an extended vacation with her family, all expenses paid. Not too long after, they got engaged and got married. How sweet is that?

But it's not just about finding "The One." I've seen my own friends use dating apps to build confidence, meet new people, and even find business connections. A buddy of mine went on a Hinge date with a woman who didn't end up being a good fit for him, but she introduced him to his current business partner. Now, they run a successful photography business together.

Of course, for every success story, plenty of people haven't found what they're looking for on dating apps. I've got friends who have been on these apps for years without finding a long-term relationship. Whether that's them and their approach is another thing...

But here's the thing - many say they don't regret using the apps. They've had their fair share of interesting experiences, learned about themselves, and at least collected some great stories to tell.

The Verdict

So what's the answer? Do people actually find love on dating apps?

The answer is a resounding... sometimes! Like anything in life, there are no guarantees. However, the data and my experiences as a dating coach for the last five years have shown that people form real, lasting relationships through these platforms.

In the end, dating apps are just tools. They can introduce you to people you might never have met otherwise, but it's up to you to make it happen. Find what works for you. Maybe that's a combination of apps and meeting people in real life.

Maybe it's focusing on your passions and letting love find you organically.

But who knows? For all you know, your next match on an app could be the start of something beautiful.

It was for me.